Don't cry over spilled soup

Over the weekend we had a party. We have such an amazing network of friends who are all just as busy as we are. Getting everyone together is a rarity, so Mark and I decided to have an open house. This allowed everybody to make it over despite hectic schedules and a gaggle of young children.

To be honest, it kind of felt like a wedding. There were so many people to spend time with that the time passed so quickly. I loved watching all of our children playing together and getting to know each other. When Mark and I started dating Hunter was the only kid in the group. It has been awesome watching the births of so many children and the creation of many more happy families over the last 7 years.

Of all of the nice things that people said to us over the course of the day and evening, the one that stuck with me the most came from someone I have only known a short period of time. She told me that my home is very comfortable. Coming from a woman who has never been in my home before and came with two small children, this was the ultimate compliment. I could care less if someone thinks my house is beautiful or fashionable; all that really matters is that people feel at home. For me, having people feel that our home is always open and welcoming is the reciprocity I want for the hard work and sacrifices we make as a family. If people are judging me based on the amount of dirty clothes in my laundry basket than they're not the type of people whose opinions I care about anyway.

Mark and I have always agreed from day one that living in a home where our children, family, and friends feel they can always come for love and support is the ultimate goal. We've all been in a house (c'mon...you know the one) where you are constantly terrified that you are going to spill your drink or your children are going to break some precious item. It is really quite uncomfortable. Although I value the things in my home, I value the PEOPLE in my home more. If someone spills a glass of red wine on a throw rug, so what? I'm certain that throw rug didn't have feelings, but the person who had the accident surely does. Mark and I are very good at handling "catastrophes" with stride and humor.

I can't help but recall the infamous "soup incident" that occured when I was pregnant with Macey. Blame it on pregnancy cravings and an extremely overactive appetite, but one day I decided to make homemade soup. Now my eyes were much bigger than my stomach, which was huge at that point, and I made a vat of bean soup large enough to feed my entire neighborhood. Deciding that it needed to cure, I figured putting in the fridge overnight would do the trick. The large stock pot almost fit when I turned its lid upside down, so I just shoved it in the bottom and thought about it no longer.

Later that night I heard my husband quietly expressing words of confusion in the kitchen. Low and behold he wasn't quite sure why he couldn't pull the meat drawer out so he just pulled a little harder. It instantly hit me what was about to occur. I tried to stop him in a very movie like moment where my "NOOOOO" was just a second too late and a bit too quiet. Before I knew it he had pulled the drawer open successfully and pulled the entire stockpot of soup out everywhere. Our eyes locked for a few seconds as we took the scene in; more than 3 gallons of soup was oozing it's way in and under the fridge and all over the floor. In a moment like this you would expect someone to get mad, for someone to loose their cool. But Mark and I....we just laughed. Not a chuckle but full belly laughs at a scene too comical to dream up. And then, just like the partners we are, we each started grabbing towels and cleaning up.

I think it is this mentality more than anything that makes people feel at home in our house. Things happen that are beyond our control, a lot, so why loose energy over them? Life is too short to waste precious time yelling at someone or "crying over spilled milk" as the old expression goes. What will be will be, it is how you handle it that really matters. I have learned that finding the humor in tough situations before I pull up my boot straps and just dive in works the most efficiently, and simultaneously teaches my children that no one is perfect and it is OK to make mistakes.

After all, it really would be silly to cry over spilled soup.